Collide
by NothingUnderControl
Summary: "Is this the part where I have to tell you how lucky any guy would be to date you? - "No! This is the part where you have to shut your trap and pray that I don't punch you!"
1. iThink I Broke an Unspoken Rule

~*Sam*~

_Munch. Munch. Munch. _

I was standing in the school hall (I swear, this place gives me da chills!) munching on my perfect cooked ham.

Suddenly, Carlotta walked up to me.

"Hey." She smiled.

I was way too tangled up in my ham. "Hawoo!" I managed to say with a mouth full of ham. Well, I don't want to swallow it first!

Carly then pushed me in a corner, smirking brightly, making me almost drop that delicious ham of mine.

"Woah, not cool, Shay!" I told her, finally facing her.

She rolled her eyes. I dived into my ham once more.

"Could you please get your face outta that ham! I need to tell you something AMAZING!" Carly rambled excitedly.

I sighed. "Fine," I put the ham down. "What is it that makes you go all woogy-woogy?" I gestured with the ham in my hand.

Carly giggled. "It'll make you go even more woogy-woogy than me, trust me!"

My eyes shot up. "You've bought Momma tape and fatcakes?" My hand found its way to the region of my heart and placed itself on it. I think I'm gonna tear up!

Carly gave me a weirded-out frown but I ignored it. "Now you make Momma go all emotionally.." I told her, wiping a non-existent tear from my eye.

"WHAT? No!" Carly hissed. "Tyson, the hot Tyson wants to ask you out! He asked me to ask your for a date for him, cause he was afraid you would break him a finger.. Or two fingers."

Clever boy! "..Or his thumbs." I added, nodding.

Carly nodded quickly, grinning like she was grinning for her live. "What do you say?"

"Uhm.." I wasn't really sure. Before I could even think of something to say, Carly spoke again.

"Say 'yes'!" She insisted, getting suddenly more serious.

I took a bite of my ham to gain time. Carly gave me a look.

Somehow I had to think about Benson. For the simple reason, that we took a break from our relationship. Are we allowed to meet other people, or am I breaking an unspoken rule here? Plus, we said those three words to each other. No, not 'School Is Out'. (which is kinda cool too, by the way.) 'Lunch Is Ready' is super awesome too.

"Sam, pretty please! He's great!" I saw Carly begging with her hands folded together, starring down at me.

"There are a whole lot other great guys waiting for Momma, ya know." I answered, hoping she would get the message.

"Yeah," Carly slowly said. "But this great guy want to invite you to a fancy restaurant for this Saturday." She explained slowly, looking deep into my face.

'Fancy Restaurant' was the cause for my sudden change of mind.

"Tell Tyler I'm in!" I smiled, walking away with my ham.

"His name's Tyson!" I heard her call after me.


	2. iBetter Shut Up

-Carly-

After School, me and Freddie decided to study a bit together. I asked Sam if she wanted to join us. She eh,.. laughed in my face until tears came from her eyes, then she patted my shoulder and told me :'Later, Carls', still chuckling to herself.. Yeah, well.

So, me and Freddie were sitting on the couch. I skimmed through the math book, while he was writing something down.

"Freddie?"

"Mhm?"

I closed the book, facing him. "Did you get number 4? Could you please explain it to me?" I pleaded sighing. I was going nuts here.. Math is a jerk!

He nodded, his eyes never leaving the paper. "Sure! One sec.."

I nodded, smiling. I was glad to have Freddie. Every time I asked Spence to help me, he began to doodle on my homework, instead of helping me out. And Gibby.. Well, Gibby!

After a while, Freddie put his notes away, looking up to me. "Okay," He smiled. "Now, let's see.." I opened the book and pointed on the task.

"Stupid math.." I mumbled.

"You sound like Sam!" Freddie told me, slightly smirking. "Speaking of that girl.. She really should do some homework. She's getting lazier and lazier with every day!"

He had a point there. Freddie used to convince her by giving her a handful smarties with every task she was doing. But lately.. He wasn't doing that anymore, therefore Sam does not do her homework. Instead she throws fat cake wrappers at happy couples at the park,

yelling : 'No to sappy chiz!'

"Whatever.." Freddie sighed deeply, taking a second look. "Oh, that's easy," He told me. "You just have to-"

Just then, the door swung open and Sam walked in with an apple in her hand. Freddie and I looked up at her and as she saw us, she looked uncomfortably around.

"Sorry, forgot something.." She mumbled. What? Freddie and me exchanged weird looks. We watched her walking out, just to hear two knocks on the door and Sam walking in again.

That was weird..

"Now, that was very polite!" I giggled at my best friends behavior, shrugging at Freddie, who frowned.

Sam took a seat at the arm chair. She then looked disgusted at the books, taking a crunchy bite on her apple.

"You still do the…," She searched for words. "Stuff with the books? Ya know..," She gulped bitterly "Studying?"

I laughed, shaking my head while Freddie pulled his brows together and smiled oddly.

"Yeah, some people do that actually.." Freddie told her, nodding while puckering his lips.

Sam rolled her eyes at him, looking annoyed. "Good for you!" She said, mocking Freddie with the same tone.

Good.. Tyson's Good! My eyes shot open. THE DATE WITH TYSON IS TOMORROW!

"SAM!" I exclaimed.

"What?" She asked surprised.

"The date with Tyson is tomorrow, Sam!" I explained. Seriously, how can she possibly ask?

"Yeah.. So?" She said rather bored. How dare she? He's sooo cute.

"Date? Who?" I heard Freddie wondering.

"Don't just say 'so'!" I whined.

Sam sighed, sitting right up. "Carls, chill. It's tomorrow!"

"Date - Who with who?" Freddie wondered ones more but this time louder. His glances jumping between me and Sam, waiting for an answer. Sam looked for a brief time at him but then back at me.

"But we have to plan what you're gonna wear. We have to make this work! Tyson's great." I told her, getting up.

"Plan? I never plan anything!," Sam answered, scoffing.

I crossed my arms. How could she be so stubborn? Ugh!

"Guys, seriously-" Freddie was cut off by Sam. "Besides, I already know what I'm going to wear!"

I smiled. Wow! So she actually gave thought to it. "Really?" I wondered, hopefully.

"Yeah, clothes." She replied.

Great.. I gave her a look.

"Sounds like a plan.." I said.

It went silent. Then Freddie spoke up.

"Wait, wait, wait!," He demanded, getting confused. "Who are we talking about? Who has a date with this Tyler guy?"

Sam chuckled lightly. Don't think I didn't hear that!

I rolled my eyes. "Tyson!" I whined, impatiently. "Why are you guys coming up with this name? There's no Tyler!"

"Yes, there is." They both said in unison.

Oh, wow.. I give up.

I gazed at them.

"Oh my!"

"Oh my.." Freddie repeated, under his breath, making fun of me. Sam snorted from the arm chair.

Hey! Why am I the victim here?

"Stop!" I told them ashamedly.

"Yeah, well. Would you guys just tell me already who of you is going on a date with Tyson?" Freddie changed the subject.

I saw Sam shifting in her seat, making a grimace. Are we playing hot seat?

"Sam has!," I said. "And she still didn't even talk to him!"

Sam glared for a brief time at me. "Yeah, I have! I said : 'Make sure the restaurant where you gonna take me to serves spaghetti!'"

I then saw Freddie looking at her carefully. She was shifting again.

"I know a good restaurant.." He halfheartedly said, offering a small smile.

"Which serves spaghetti?" Sam asked him suddenly excited.

"Forget the spaghetti! Let's get you some cute clothes for your date!" I smirked.

"..So you like Tyson?" Freddie wanted to know.

Sam then looked at him, looked at me and ran to the door. "Gotta go! Byeeee!"

With that she was out.

"Well..," I shrugged nervously at Freddie. "Let's get you some cute clothes, then." I joked, chuckling.

Freddie glared at me.

".. I'll shut up." I quickly sat, sitting down again.


	3. iWould Love to Be a Pig

**Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly**

**Thank you all for the awesome reviews! It made my day! :) Here's the next chap :**

* * *

><p>-Sam-<p>

So today I had my date with Tyson. I told the dude to come and pick me up from Bushwell Plaza. Carly dressed me up, made my hair and done my makeup, therefore I was ready and had enough time, to lay a little on the couch and watch some cartoons.

I laughed out loud when Girly Cow began to moo in panic. I love that cow!

"Sam!" I heard someone exclaim in an annoyed way from behind me. I turned around to look who was interrupting my last few minutes with the TV before Tyson would come and pick me up.

It was Carly. She was standing on the stairs with her hand on her hips, giving me an eye roll.

"Look, I'd love to have a little chit chat with you but I need to watch -" I tried to bluff it out but Carly cut me off with a sigh.

"We're not finished yet, Sam." She said.

"I _am_ finished!" I corrected, before I turned around to the TV again.

Seriously, I did not care what I look like for that mate. I just wanted to have some fancy, yummy food. That is all I ever ask for! Is that too much to ask? NO, I don't think so.

"Sam!"

"Do you have any floss? I am going to need it when I'm finished with the dishes.." I asked her, pointing at my mouth.

"Gross! Stop that nonsense and let me refine your makeup."

Refine? Seriously, Carly?

I gave her an odd look. "Nooo.." I slowly told her.

Carly sighed in defeat. "You are so careless, Sam. How can you not freak out and be over excited when such s cute, smart, hot, polite guy asks you out?"

I gulped lightly and my gaze fell to the ground.

You wanna know how I can be so careless about that? I don't need _any _of these guys. The only guy I need and ever needed is the sap across the hall who always makes me laugh, who likes me for who I am and stays a loyal, helpful friend even after all those fights, pranks and name callings.

He is the one who has my heart and.. I won't ever change that. Simply cause I can't.

_Quit it, Puckett!, _I told myself.

"That's how _I _roll!" I told her cockily, as I laid back.

Carly smirked amused. "Right."

"And uh, where's the dork?" I wondered.

After I bolted out yesterday, I didn't see him..

Carly made her way towards me and sat down on the couch. "Don't know after you escaped," She gave me a stern look, when she said 'escaped' and I gave her an nervous one back.

"Gibby came and talked about watercolors, soon after Freddie said he had to go home." She finished with a shrug.

"Was he different than his dorky self? Maybe.. More dorky?" I fiddled and struggled with the words. Well, I'm not a Wordmaster!

Carly glanced at me with a smirk. "Why do you ask?" She sang, knowingly.

"Uh-uh, uh, Shaaay," I answered teasingly, shaking my head. "I asked first!"

"Well, he was definitely more quite." Carly said.

Something felt heavy inside of me. Just like one time when I ate that staled bread. Was that.. Guilt?

Carly often told me tales about the feeling, so called 'guilt'. I can't remember exactly but she said that it came, when you knew that you did something wrong. So you would feel bad about it.

If so, I don't like feeling guilty.

And _why _was I guilty?

Just then, the someone knocked on the door.

"Oh my gosh! It's him, it is him, Sam! I can FEEL it!" Carly exclaimed panicky, rocking me back and forth. My eyes shot open. I love her an' all but.. What the chiz is wrong with her?

She sprinted to the door and looked through the spy. "It's him!" She mouthed, excitedly.

"Woe," I chuckled. "Sure that I'm the one who has the date?"

Carly opened the door, while running a hand through her hair.

There he was standing and smiling at me. Dressed all fancy. Sorry, I don't care enough to describe.. "Hey, Sam." He softly said.

Carly grinned at me.

"Hey, Ty!" I nodded from the couch.

"So.. Do you have floss now, or what?" I then asked Carly.

* * *

><p>Tyson opened me the car door and helped me out of the car. What a gentlemen! I would not be surprised if he would carry me bridal style to the restaurant.<p>

We talked a bit on the ride to the restaurant. He told me that he liked Cuttlefish as well and his favorite color is brown, just like mine! Some of our interest were similar, some were different but all in all it was a pretty good talk.

The restaurant looked big, fancy and promising but the most important thing is still : The food.

We walked in and took our seats and soon after ordered our food.

"So, do you like it here?" Tyson asked me, smiling.

I looked around, nodding. "Yea, seems great!"

"Cool.." He smiled happily. Wow, he does a lot smiling..

"Uh," He cleared his throat. "What do you do in your free time, besides iCarly?"

I shrugged. "I watch MMA fights, eat, sleep, do some pranks, yea." I grinned, proudly.

"Well.. Okay," He chuckled a bit.

_Oh, yea.. Almost forgot. Be polite, Sam!_

"'N you?" I wondered, scratching my neck awkwardly.

"Oh, I like MMA fights, too. But I don't do the rest.. I mean, sure, I uh, eat and sleep but that's not.. That's not my -" He gestured desperately and I couldn't help but laugh.

"..hobby." He flashed a smile.

I smiled back and my laughter died down.

"I like it when you laugh." He told me quietly and I felt my cheeks blush.

"WHERE'S THE DARN FOOD?" I yelled across the whole restaurant.

He was surprised by my sudden move, and cringed a bit.

"You're super hungry?" - "Yea."

"When it comes to food you really seem to lose control." He stated.

"Tell me about it!" I rolled my eyes. Duh!

"And you have an attitude." He then added, pointing at me.

Way to be a gentlemen!

"Cut it out, would ya?" I retorted annoyed.

"Excuse me?" He frowned.

"Stop pointing all the bad things out! Momma has a chunk of good features, too, you know!" I exclaimed.

What a catch..

"I know," He replied with an apologizing look. "I was just joking."

"Whatevs." I shrugged.

His gaze did not left me, he then finally spoke up. "See, actually _I _have some really bad features."

"Like what?" I couldn't help but wonder. He seemed perfect..

"Like making bad jokes?"

I chuckled lightly.

"No, really," He said. "I can get very easily jealous and some people say that I care too much for the ones I love.. But you can't care enough, right?" Wheesh, what a wuss!

"I WANNA SEE SOME FOOD HERE!"

* * *

><p>Wow! The food was.. Was.. Was like paradise! Tyson was talking but I kept on eating without listening to him. I just nodded a few times and agreed.<p>

Suddenly, a women who was sitting nearby, glanced disgustedly at me.

"Some people don't have any manners!" She spoke cockily.

"What was that, Snobbington?" I turned around to face her. My mouth was still full of spaghetti.

"Sam, just -" Ty began but I stretched my arm out telling him to wait. He sighed.

The women gasped. "What did you just call me?"

"You heard me." I told her casual.

"How dare you! You have eating habits like a pig! Did no one told you that, poor kid?"

"Stop snobbing around, old lady!" I told her. "You're not any better than me just because you probably eat in restaurants that serve meals, smaller than a stain of bird crap!"

She gasped once more, loss for words. "By the way, I would love being a pig.. Better than being some annoying human being like you, smug lady!"

She glared at me and walked sassily away.

"Sam, what was that?" Tyson looked shocked.

"Well, didn't you see how she tried to bring me down?" I scoffed, pointing behind me where that skunk bag was sitting a second ago.

"You shouldn't listen to her!" He hissed.

What? I gazed puzzled back at him. "So I should just ignore her? I have something called 'pride', you know.." I took the fork and stabbed it in my food.

"She was talking nonsense!" He sighed.

"Exactly! You can't just let anybody nag at you!" I answered, meeting his gaze.

This night was going downhill..

"There they are!" I looked up and saw that lady with two waitresses, standing at our table.

Great, now I could not even enjoy the food!

"Sorry but I have to ask you to leave this restaurant." One of the waitress said.

"But -" I tried to protest, pointing at that demon. I'M GONNA RIPP HER HEAD OFF!

"Miss, please leave now."

"Tyson!" I turned around and faced him.

He looked at both of the waitresses, then he said : "I.. I don't know her.."

..So much for 'perfect' and 'caring for the ones he loves'.

"Dude! You sit on the same table as me! If you lie, do it at least believable!" I told him, narrowing my eyes, as I got up from my seat.

I walked past the waitresses and as I walked past the women, I saw her looking carefully at me like I was a horse with two heads. "BOO!"

She screeched and I smiled evilly.

"And you're spaghetti's disgusting. Too much salt in the sauce, you disappointed me!" I called over my shoulder, as I walked out that madhouse.

Now I was standing at night on the parking place. I needed a ride. No, I needed the nub.

I took my cell phone out and dialed the number.

"Sam, is that you? Aren't you on a date right now?" I heard him quietly on the other end of the line.

I smirked. I missed his voice!

"Come and pick me up nub.. Please?"


	4. iWill Bring You Home

**Yay! Thanks a ton for all the great reviews :) Again : Thank you, guys! Here's the next chapter : **

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><p>He went quiet for a moment there. But then the dork finally spoke. "You okay, Sam?"<p>

I rolled my eyes, despite the fact that he couldn't see me through the chizzy phone!

"Why wouldn't I be? Just come and pick me up already! I'm freezing my butt off here." I hissed into the phone. I walked a little, so that I would not transform into a lump of ice.

"Chill, I'm on my way," He said. "By the way, what is with that.. Super handsome Tyson dude? Isn't your date supposed to bring you back home and not your dorky friend?" I heard him mumble gloomily.

… And there it was again. Welcome back, guilt! Missed ya… NOT!

I sighed, closing my eyes for a brief time. Man, why was I feeling that way?

"The super handsome Tyson, is a super slimy douche bag!" I told him in a matter of fact tone.

He chuckled. "That's more like it!," I smiled. "And.. What about your dorky friend?" He wondered, trying to hide his nosiness from Momma!

My smile became bigger. "He's just half as dorky."

Then there was nothing. Ugh! I am so bored..

"Nub! Keep me entertained!" I exclaimed.

"What? Sam I'm driving!," The whiney nub whined. "You can call yourself lucky that I drive and talk to you on the phone - you know, it's illegal!"

I quietly mimicked him in the most dumbest way I managed. Why is he such a goody- goody?

"Wow, Benson. You're such a rule breaker!," I gasped sarcastically. "What will you do next.. Drink while you drive? WOOO!"

"Haha, so funny, Puckett!" He retorted in a dully tone.

"Whatevs." I said. "Just come and bring me home.." I kicked a little rock that was laying in front of my feet.

I felt so worn out. I was hungry, tired, annoyed, cold and sick of that make up and these shoes! All that because of this stupid jerk, called Tyson Mc - I don't even care!

"Freddie.. What is taking you so long?" I asked sleepily.

"Hold on," He softly answered. "I know your date took you to a restaurant but you're hungry anyway. So I brought you fried chicken on the way. I'm almost there."

FRIED CHICKEN! I LOVE FRIED CHICKEN! And so, I was wide awake again!

"Thank you, Benson. You are a GENIUS!" I smiled happily. I could already smell it. Aw, fried chicken.. Momma _looooves _you!

"Thanks." I could hear the sheepish grin behind it.

* * *

><p>I saw his car and it parked right next to me. I quickly got in. My nose felt cold and I couldn't feel my fingers anymore. That stunk!<p>

"Hey." He smiled

"Sup?" I nodded slowly.

There was silence, then Fredward spoke up.

"Uh, one sec!" He raised his finger and crawled to the car boot.

What the chiz was he doing? I smiled goofily as he turned his behind to me to get something.

"Nice butt." I commented, knowing that it would abash him.

He quickly turned around and threw a green blanket on my lap. His face was redder than mine got from the cold outside.

He huffed and refused to face me. I chuckled lightly at his behavior. He was a _real _gentlemen. A quickly getting embarrassed gentlemen. I loved that!

"Now where's my fried chicken?" I asked excited, as I looked around the car.

"Here." He said and handed me a brown paper bag. There it was.. My treasure!

I opened it and took one out, chewing like crazy on it. _Mhhh _I closed my eyes to savor this moment properly.

Freddie started the motor and we made our way home.

"So," Freddie began between my loud munching. "How was your date?"

"Are you kidding me?," I asked munching on my food. "It's not even worth it calling it a 'date'." I used my dirty hands to make air quotes around 'date' because : Boy.. That was so not a date!

I saw Freddie grinning from the corner of my eye. Normally I would punch him for that but this time I let him get away with that. I grinned myself a bit, before I took a bite.

"What did he do?" He wondered, hiding his grin.

"He said that I had an attitude, that I lose control when it comes to food, which is true but whatever AND he said that he doesn't know me when the waitress kicked me out!" I explained quickly.

"Airhead," Was Freddie's answer. "Besides, wasn't he sitting on the same table as you?"

"I know right!" I agreed, chuckling. "I wish I would have let him eat on the floor.."

"Why did they kick you out, anyway?" Benson wondered, frowning. "Did you use too much parmesan again?"

.. He was speaking of our date. I felt.. Weird. So I cleared my throat and shook my head.

"No, there was a dumb lady who said I eat like a pig, so I frazzled her out!"

"What did you say?"

"I called her 'Snobbington', told her to cut that snobby chiz out and said that I would love to be a pig!" I replied.

"Snobbington sounds great. We should make an iCarly segment which includes that lady. We could call her that!" Woah, that was an epic idea!

"See? You _are _creative, dorkington!" I patted him on the shoulder.

"It was your idea," He blushed lightly. "And don't use those names on me!" Fredward added annoyed.

"That Tyson guy ticked me even more off!," I admitted, scoffing. "He didn't even had the guts to ask me out and then he.. Just let me down." I mumbled, taking the last bite of my fried chicken.

"Is this the part where I have to tell you how lucky any guy would be to date you?" I faced Freddie and he did a little dance with his eyebrows.

He indeed _is _a dork.

"No! This is the part where you have to shut your trap and pray that I don't punch you!" I snarled angrily.

"Okay." He simply said.

I sighed and looked out the window. Boring as chiz..

"Buuut," I heard Freddie smirking, so I turned to face him. "We're gonna get back on him!"

A grin spread on my face. The nub had something **evil** on his mind! Momma was kinda proud.

"Wow, dork. I finally rub off on you!" I still grinned proudly.

"Yeah.. I don't know if this is so good." He retorted.

"HEY!" I exclaimed, punching him on the shoulder.

"Sam, I'm driving!" He complained back.

"You deserved it."

"Why?" He asked upset.

".. You ruined the moment." I told him quietly, glaring out the window.

"To be honest, I'm just glad that it didn't work out with Tyson." He told me.

WHAT? My eyes shot open. Did I just misheard him, or what?

"What are you talking about, dishrag?"

"Just being honest." He shrugged.

"Whatever." I waved it away. Little did he know, I was grinning like a dumbo.


End file.
